Tuesday, February 28, 2006
What's Really Hood?
Why do hood rat teens prefer to stroll slowly around the block as they devour their KFC/Taco Bell/White Castles, instead of sitting somewhere while they eat? Sit near an inner city high school as it lets out for the day, and watch this phenomena unfold sometime. They almost always toss their shit on the ground after they're finished. A garbage can in front of KFC/Taco Bell has remained 2/3 empty for at least two weeks now, while trash is stacking up all around it. Thanks White Castle for insisting to put each little burger in those cardboard containers. It would be an interesting study to see how many of those things actually end up in the garbage.
The experience of getting "food" from these places is genuinely ghetto. The workers are ghetto, the customers are ghetto, the old stinky guy with the raging red eye balls who just wants to use the bathroom (which needs to be buzzed open) is real ghetto. The rats in the dumpster out back are ghetto. The fryer is ghetto. The sticky, filthy floor that gave up the hopes of a thorough mopping a long time ago, is...yep that's right.
The customers are usually loud, dumb sounding young people. Or run down, over worked older Black men. An occasional White drunk dude. Old haggard women without their teeth.
The workers are usually a medley of over-the-hill hapless older folks who missed a lot of trains in life. Or the pregnant, loud talking, gold front wearing, chicken head (White or Black), who is way more concerned with talking to the thugster leaning over the counter trying to swindle some free shit out of her, than ringing up any paying customer. Plus there's the manager who actually has to make this circus operate. They always look like they havn't slept in years, and their will power and/or sanity is on the brink of ruin.
What needs to happen, is they tear down that portal to inner city hell, and a Black entrepreneur open up a market and sell food with some nutitional value. Not malt liquor, not Black and Milds, not fucking donuts, not beef jerkey, not lottery scratch-offs, not Nerd ropes, not porn mags (okay porn mags, but keep them back further behind the counter), and not phone cards.
Preserve inner city architecture. Reinvest in the hood.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Sunday, February 26, 2006
My Cabbie is a Dog Named Goat
Last night I was chillin in my cage talking shit to the peacocks and being bored when off in the distance I heard the "La cuca rocha" jingle getting closer. An old yellow van appeared and parked in the street outside the fence. I knew what to do. I slipped out of the cage (they never actually lock it), jumped the main fence, and climbed on top of the van. I waved to my jealous primates as we drove away, and they frantically flung poop in the general direction of the street in protest. They're haters. (it should be known that I got over the poop throwing issue as a youngster, no worries)
The van's driver is a close friend of mine. He's a little cantankerous dog named Goat. We go out almost every weekend to various local pubs or just roll around and see what we see. We both get pretty complacent in our everyday doldrums, so these excursions are crucial to both of our sanity.
Goat lives in a crappy, rundown effeciency on the west side of town. He writes obituaries for a bunch of fledgling newspapers across the country, and tries to swindle people through different on-line pyramid schemes. He drinks Mad Dog 20/20 every night until he pukes himself to sleep, and smokes (but more like just chews on) Backwood cigars which have rotted many of his teeth away. He remains heartbroken over a hoodrat teen named Kiki who left him two years ago. She was, and likely still is, gangster as fuck, which is why she even messed with a dog in the first place. She used Goat to get drunk and high all the time, and ran off one day with a gun runner. He's never been the same since.
He picks a lot of fights when we're out at bars. He's the classic shit talkin' little guy with quite literally, a monkey on his back. He hates the show Family Guy because of how it portrays the acceptance of an intelligent dog within our society. "Brian the dog, is a fucking farce. It's not like that at all. People aren't cool to intelligent dogs. We're the bottom of the food chain in this society. Even the big fucking ape here has it better." He rants about how at least I'm an exotic animal who people expect to find in a cage and where all my primary needs are met on a daily basis. "I have to eat fucking cat food some nights. CAT FOOD! Do you know how degrading that is?" he'll ask fighting back tears. I've offered to move him in to my cage but he thinks that just sounds too weird.
He's a pretty good guy underneath though. We usually have a good time, and I can get him laughing sometimes. I'm trying to build his confidence up enough to talk to more women, but it's tough due to his severe emotional scarring.
We returned that night from our bender...wasted. I think I made an ass of myself again at the tavern, and may have even been banned for good this time. I have some strange bruises on my hands and my fur smells like grilled cheese. Goat and I tuned in a little in the cage when we got back, and tried discussing some permanent escape plans.
We always talk about me taking him back to Indonesia with me, but we both know it'll never happen. I can leave the cage for a while, but I can't go too far. Let's be honest, I've got it made here. Sure I'd like to see Moms and dem again, but a 3000lb. orangutan has a hard time just slipping through security at the airport. I tell Goat, "You being a dog, can travel abroad a lot easier without me. If you just act like a regular dog..." He always cuts me off at that point and says he refuses to conform to society. He is a dog of his principles and I'm not gonna stand in the way of that.
So that's Goat. If you ever see us out one night, say something nice to him. He sure could use it.
Until next time.
Mojokong - the passenger not the driver
My Cabbie is a Dog Named Goat
Last night I was chillin in my cage talking shit to the peacocks and being bored when off in the distance I heard the "La cuca rocha" jingle getting closer. An old yellow van appeared and parked in the street outside the fence. I knew what to do. I slipped out of the cage (they never actually lock it), jumped the main fence, and climbed on top of the van. I waved to my jealous primates as we drove away, and they frantically flung poop in the general direction of the street in protest. They're haters. (it should be known that I got over the poop throwing issue as a youngster, no worries)
The van's driver is a close friend of mine. He's a little cantankerous dog named Goat. We go out almost every weekend to various local pubs or just roll around and see what we see. We both get pretty complacent in our everyday doldrums, so these excursions are crucial to both of our sanity.
Goat lives in a crappy, rundown effeciency on the west side of town. He writes obituaries for a bunch of fledgling newspapers across the country, and tries to swindle people through different on-line pyramid schemes. He drinks Mad Dog 20/20 every night until he pukes himself to sleep, and smokes (but more like just chews on) Backwood cigars which have rotted many of his teeth away. He remains heartbroken over a hoodrat teen named Kiki who left him two years ago. She was, and likely still is, gangster as fuck, which is why she even messed with a dog in the first place. She used Goat to get drunk and high all the time, and ran off one day with a gun runner. He's never been the same since.
He picks a lot of fights when we're out at bars. He's the classic shit talkin' little guy with quite literally, a monkey on his back. He hates the show Family Guy because of how it portrays the acceptance of an intelligent dog within our society. "Brian the dog, is a fucking farce. It's not like that at all. People aren't cool to intelligent dogs. We're the bottom of the food chain in this society. Even the big fucking ape here has it better." He rants about how at least I'm an exotic animal who people expect to find in a cage and where all my primary needs are met on a daily basis. "I have to eat fucking cat food some nights. CAT FOOD! Do you know how degrading that is?" he'll ask fighting back tears. I've offered to move him in to my cage but he thinks that just sounds too weird.
He's a pretty good guy underneath though. We usually have a good time, and I can get him laughing sometimes. I'm trying to build his confidence up enough to talk to more women, but it's tough due to his severe emotional scarring.
We returned that night from our bender...wasted. I think I made an ass of myself again at the tavern, and may have even been banned for good this time. I have some strange bruises on my hands and my fur smells like grilled cheese. Goat and I tuned in a little in the cage when we got back, and tried discussing some permanent escape plans.
We always talk about me taking him back to Indonesia with me, but we both know it'll never happen. I can leave the cage for a while, but I can't go too far. Let's be honest, I've got it made here. Sure I'd like to see Moms and dem again, but a 3000lb. orangutan has a hard time just slipping through security at the airport. I tell Goat, "You being a dog, can travel abroad a lot easier without me. If you just act like a regular dog..." He always cuts me off at that point and says he refuses to conform to society. He is a dog of his principles and I'm not gonna stand in the way of that.
So that's Goat. If you ever see us out one night, say something nice to him. He sure could use it.
Until next time.
Mojokong - the passenger not the driver
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Power Spigots
I'm gonna rant about world politics for a while. Feel free to pull out now.
Oil! The word of this decade. Desperation is setting in worldwide.
Saudi Arabia: Suicide bombers failed in an attempt to attack the worlds largest oil processing facility.
Nigeria: An armed rebel group has shut down a fifth of the nations vast oil supply
Venezuela: President Hugo Chavez continues to threaten to cut off all oil supplies to the US.
All this in yesterdays newspaper. The mad scramble is on. Oil is the common thread of luxury wealthier societies enjoy. Poorer people rely on it less. So when it begins to show signs of running out, and the wealthy socities way of life is threatened even a little bit, the natives take their land back and threaten to cut us off.
Pay attention to Hugo Chavez. Venezuela has gobs of oil reserves and he's not playing around with the US. If he totally shuts America off you could feel upwards of $6 a gallon. Today he banned most American flights coming into Venezuela, and kicked out the US embassy on grounds of spying. He recently gave discounted rates for low income American's in Massachusets for their heating bills this winter. Two non-profit agencies distributed the discounts. He also provides Cuba with discounted oil prices. He claims the US has made assasination attempts on him and will continue to do so. He's hardcore socialist and US always bashes him for human rights violations, but then they use censorship in the presses as their example. Latin America will rally behind this guy big time and could prove to be a real stickler to American policy. Frankly I havn't read a whole lot that I didn't agree with. Relax NSA...I'm just saying.
Also in Nigeria 100 people were killed in violence stemming from the cartoon protests. This stuff is still going on. It's become a wildfire throughout the globe of pent up religious hatred that has brought nothing but more venom to the modern crusades. A man draws a picture on one continent. Other, totally unrelated people on a seperate continent, are killing and being killed weeks afterward for this drawing. It's an excuse to incite violence, and oppressed, angry people are ready to pounce. I still think the wave is being supported by more than just anger and demand for religious right. US/Israel have their mitts somewhere in this, for some shadowy reason. Most likely to create further instability in the area and add to the portrayal of extremist violence the US likes to feed us in order to desensitize Americans to Arab deaths.
Lastly, it seems an Iranian invasion is likely. The region is hot, and Iran is the toughest brother of the mid east family right now. If Hamas is backed by Iran that spells trouble for our interest and we wont let that happen. The US military is too stretched to invade so look for European militaries to do so, namely Russia.
I'll spare you for now. We'll do something fun next time, I promise.
Save the Apes y'all.
Mojokong - squashin' soapboxes
Power Spigots
I'm gonna rant about world politics for a while. Feel free to pull out now.
Oil! The word of this decade. Desperation is setting in worldwide.
Saudi Arabia: Suicide bombers failed in an attempt to attack the worlds largest oil processing facility.
Nigeria: An armed rebel group has shut down a fifth of the nations vast oil supply
Venezuela: President Hugo Chavez continues to threaten to cut off all oil supplies to the US.
All this in yesterdays newspaper. The mad scramble is on. Oil is the common thread of luxury wealthier societies enjoy. Poorer people rely on it less. So when it begins to show signs of running out, and the wealthy socities way of life is threatened even a little bit, the natives take their land back and threaten to cut us off.
Pay attention to Hugo Chavez. Venezuela has gobs of oil reserves and he's not playing around with the US. If he totally shuts America off you could feel upwards of $6 a gallon. Today he banned most American flights coming into Venezuela, and kicked out the US embassy on grounds of spying. He recently gave discounted rates for low income American's in Massachusets for their heating bills this winter. Two non-profit agencies distributed the discounts. He also provides Cuba with discounted oil prices. He claims the US has made assasination attempts on him and will continue to do so. He's hardcore socialist and US always bashes him for human rights violations, but then they use censorship in the presses as their example. Latin America will rally behind this guy big time and could prove to be a real stickler to American policy. Frankly I havn't read a whole lot that I didn't agree with. Relax NSA...I'm just saying.
Also in Nigeria 100 people were killed in violence stemming from the cartoon protests. This stuff is still going on. It's become a wildfire throughout the globe of pent up religious hatred that has brought nothing but more venom to the modern crusades. A man draws a picture on one continent. Other, totally unrelated people on a seperate continent, are killing and being killed weeks afterward for this drawing. It's an excuse to incite violence, and oppressed, angry people are ready to pounce. I still think the wave is being supported by more than just anger and demand for religious right. US/Israel have their mitts somewhere in this, for some shadowy reason. Most likely to create further instability in the area and add to the portrayal of extremist violence the US likes to feed us in order to desensitize Americans to Arab deaths.
Lastly, it seems an Iranian invasion is likely. The region is hot, and Iran is the toughest brother of the mid east family right now. If Hamas is backed by Iran that spells trouble for our interest and we wont let that happen. The US military is too stretched to invade so look for European militaries to do so, namely Russia.
I'll spare you for now. We'll do something fun next time, I promise.
Save the Apes y'all.
Mojokong - squashin' soapboxes
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Make me pretty.
Alright. Today's topic is mens beauty products. The hair gel, the body spray, the shavers with eleven razors, men (or anyone) needing to tan themselves orange during the winter, the waxing?!!, conditioner for men. What?
At some point, seemingly in the earlier 90's, marketers decided men just weren't pretty enough. They didn't glow and glimmer quite like their female counterparts. So they suped-up the male image to look shinier and sharper. Not like "you look pretty sharp", like accute angles-sharp. The hair. It could literally pop balloons. And the fact a person is expected to take time to achieve the percieved effect of bed head... c'mon.
The smells are funny too. Now, I don't like a smelly person as much as the next guy, but you always have those people who waaay over do something like that which makes buses, elevators, ect. suck more than they have to. Whatever happened to men expected to smell clean, not floral.
And the worst part is this. Men don't want to go the extra mile. Being clean and comfortable, and even taking pride in your appearence is fine. Recommended even. But it's the moment a man feels a little silly for administering a beauty technique to himself, is what I'm talking about. That second of acknowledgement that a man tells himself "I'm doing this in hopes of getting pussy", is when the markerters have won.
Now I expect a little female backlash from this double-standard perspective. "Why should women do it if men don't have to?" The fact is you don't. We could delve into the patriarchal societies throughout history thing, but we won't go there today. Men will want to pro-create no matter what the circumstances.
Imagine me with my shoulder and arm hair all spiked everywhere. I could spray some body spray on me and watch the female chimps swarm my cage. How about a chest hair waxing....ouch! A little moisturizer for my eye wrinkles. Some Viagara if the rest of that stuff works. You see now?
Mojokong the Aesthetically Pleasing
Make me pretty.
Alright. Today's topic is mens beauty products. The hair gel, the body spray, the shavers with eleven razors, men (or anyone) needing to tan themselves orange during the winter, the waxing?!!, conditioner for men. What?
At some point, seemingly in the earlier 90's, marketers decided men just weren't pretty enough. They didn't glow and glimmer quite like their female counterparts. So they suped-up the male image to look shinier and sharper. Not like "you look pretty sharp", like accute angles-sharp. The hair. It could literally pop balloons. And the fact a person is expected to take time to achieve the percieved effect of bed head... c'mon.
The smells are funny too. Now, I don't like a smelly person as much as the next guy, but you always have those people who waaay over do something like that which makes buses, elevators, ect. suck more than they have to. Whatever happened to men expected to smell clean, not floral.
And the worst part is this. Men don't want to go the extra mile. Being clean and comfortable, and even taking pride in your appearence is fine. Recommended even. But it's the moment a man feels a little silly for administering a beauty technique to himself, is what I'm talking about. That second of acknowledgement that a man tells himself "I'm doing this in hopes of getting pussy", is when the markerters have won.
Now I expect a little female backlash from this double-standard perspective. "Why should women do it if men don't have to?" The fact is you don't. We could delve into the patriarchal societies throughout history thing, but we won't go there today. Men will want to pro-create no matter what the circumstances.
Imagine me with my shoulder and arm hair all spiked everywhere. I could spray some body spray on me and watch the female chimps swarm my cage. How about a chest hair waxing....ouch! A little moisturizer for my eye wrinkles. Some Viagara if the rest of that stuff works. You see now?
Mojokong the Aesthetically Pleasing
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Let's see some hands.
I don't want to get too preachy with you folks, and I don't want anybody thinking I'm some kind of "holier than thou" because I'm absolutely not. But...
I want to encourage everybody to give one hour of their week to do something for someone else. This can be as little as picking up trash on your street, or as involved as volunteering for charitable organizations. This could also just be watching someone's kids for an hour to give a single parent time do something else. Or making a grocery run for an elderly/handicapped person. There's a million ways to contribute.
In Cincinnati there is an org. called "Center for Peace Education" where they provide kids peaceful alternatives to handling confrontational situations. They're managed by a bigger org. called Community Shares where an individaul can learn how to get involved with like 30 different grass-roots projects. They're very flexible.
I know many of you already do something or other for the world, and I know for others time is the most valuable commodity in their lives and it's hard to donate some. But I'm just putting the message out there, and it never hurts to tell somebody else.
It will make yourself and others around you feel better. 2006 is "Actions not Words", can you dig it?
Mojokong the Messenger
Let's see some hands.
I don't want to get too preachy with you folks, and I don't want anybody thinking I'm some kind of "holier than thou" because I'm absolutely not. But...
I want to encourage everybody to give one hour of their week to do something for someone else. This can be as little as picking up trash on your street, or as involved as volunteering for charitable organizations. This could also just be watching someone's kids for an hour to give a single parent time do something else. Or making a grocery run for an elderly/handicapped person. There's a million ways to contribute.
In Cincinnati there is an org. called "Center for Peace Education" where they provide kids peaceful alternatives to handling confrontational situations. They're managed by a bigger org. called Community Shares where an individaul can learn how to get involved with like 30 different grass-roots projects. They're very flexible.
I know many of you already do something or other for the world, and I know for others time is the most valuable commodity in their lives and it's hard to donate some. But I'm just putting the message out there, and it never hurts to tell somebody else.
It will make yourself and others around you feel better. 2006 is "Actions not Words", can you dig it?
Mojokong the Messenger
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
The world need smore Hacksaws
A lot has been made over the years of the selfish attitudes of pro athletes, but today we focus on a damn good one. Hacksaw Jim Duggan. "Hooooooooooh!!!"
Hacksaw went about his business with a humble, workman's like philosophy wielding an Amreican flag, and a 2x4. Jim was a simple wrestler who liked to stick out his tongue and give everybody an enthusiastic thumbs-up after, before, and during matches. Me and my kind are huge fans of his for being one of the most ape-like pro atheletes of all time (see: Paul Silas, Lyle Alzedo, and the classic missing link Pat Ewing). Ocasionally, one the Gorillas will bust out with a "hooooooooooh", and that gets everybody going for a while. A lot of thumbs up and tongues out around my cage.
He never seemed to be the top dog of pro wrestling, but he never griped. He would kick a little ass, give a hardy "Hooooooooooh", and probably go smash a case of beer with his 2x4. THe TO's of the world could take a lesson of Hack's attitude of how things get done the right way. That is unintelligably, with a huge wooden board slung across your shoulders. And probably drunk. See how contract negotiations go then, especially when you scare the crap out of ownership by screaming "hooooooooh" with your tongue scattering saliva beads all over the board table.
Hacksaw here is to the genius in your simplicity. "HooooooooooooooooooooH!!!"
The world need smore Hacksaws
A lot has been made over the years of the selfish attitudes of pro athletes, but today we focus on a damn good one. Hacksaw Jim Duggan. "Hooooooooooh!!!"
Hacksaw went about his business with a humble, workman's like philosophy wielding an Amreican flag, and a 2x4. Jim was a simple wrestler who liked to stick out his tongue and give everybody an enthusiastic thumbs-up after, before, and during matches. Me and my kind are huge fans of his for being one of the most ape-like pro atheletes of all time (see: Paul Silas, Lyle Alzedo, and the classic missing link Pat Ewing). Ocasionally, one the Gorillas will bust out with a "hooooooooooh", and that gets everybody going for a while. A lot of thumbs up and tongues out around my cage.
He never seemed to be the top dog of pro wrestling, but he never griped. He would kick a little ass, give a hardy "Hooooooooooh", and probably go smash a case of beer with his 2x4. THe TO's of the world could take a lesson of Hack's attitude of how things get done the right way. That is unintelligably, with a huge wooden board slung across your shoulders. And probably drunk. See how contract negotiations go then, especially when you scare the crap out of ownership by screaming "hooooooooh" with your tongue scattering saliva beads all over the board table.
Hacksaw here is to the genius in your simplicity. "HooooooooooooooooooooH!!!"
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Strangers
I've recently received a lot of negativity from strangers when I try to strike up conversations with them. And not just because I'm an orangutan either. They immediatetly hypothesize ulterior motives I may have for disturbing them. Examples.
Over the weekend at the bar (yes, monkeys need a drink from time to time too), I was sitting next to a woman by herself, doing nothing but drinking. I said hello to her and she looked away and shook her head, disgusted. I was insulted, and decided to press the issue. I asked her if she owned a sailboat, what she would name it. She turned and said, "No. I'm not gonna hook up with you. Stop trying."
Later sitting in the same seat (the woman eventaully scoffed and left), was a guy drinking and peeling his beer label off the bottle. I said hello and he nodded silently back. I am asked him the same question, and he said "Look man. I'm not gonna buy anything from you. I'm not gonna sign up for anything. I'm not down for the cause, or whatever it is."
There's also the opposite effect of these examples. The type of stranger you meet who immediately wants to be your best friend, your girlfriend/boyfriend, your life long business partner. The cling-ons.
We translate the term "meeting new people" usually as laying groundwork to accomplish some type of personal goal. The "new people" we meet, need to fall into some type of social category to us personally. Romantic interest, close friend, friend, acquaintance, seen around, don't like, fuck them. It can never be about just experiencing the moment with someone else, and then letting it go. I shouldn't feel a hesitation to talk to people I don't know because they may perceive me in the wrong way.
We're alive. Experiences come in all forms. Why miss out on them because your not sure where they'll lead. It's this moment that matters, not the next one and not the previous one. Talk to someone you don't know and relax.
Mojokong the Moment Eater
Strangers
I've recently received a lot of negativity from strangers when I try to strike up conversations with them. And not just because I'm an orangutan either. They immediatetly hypothesize ulterior motives I may have for disturbing them. Examples.
Over the weekend at the bar (yes, monkeys need a drink from time to time too), I was sitting next to a woman by herself, doing nothing but drinking. I said hello to her and she looked away and shook her head, disgusted. I was insulted, and decided to press the issue. I asked her if she owned a sailboat, what she would name it. She turned and said, "No. I'm not gonna hook up with you. Stop trying."
Later sitting in the same seat (the woman eventaully scoffed and left), was a guy drinking and peeling his beer label off the bottle. I said hello and he nodded silently back. I am asked him the same question, and he said "Look man. I'm not gonna buy anything from you. I'm not gonna sign up for anything. I'm not down for the cause, or whatever it is."
There's also the opposite effect of these examples. The type of stranger you meet who immediately wants to be your best friend, your girlfriend/boyfriend, your life long business partner. The cling-ons.
We translate the term "meeting new people" usually as laying groundwork to accomplish some type of personal goal. The "new people" we meet, need to fall into some type of social category to us personally. Romantic interest, close friend, friend, acquaintance, seen around, don't like, fuck them. It can never be about just experiencing the moment with someone else, and then letting it go. I shouldn't feel a hesitation to talk to people I don't know because they may perceive me in the wrong way.
We're alive. Experiences come in all forms. Why miss out on them because your not sure where they'll lead. It's this moment that matters, not the next one and not the previous one. Talk to someone you don't know and relax.
Mojokong the Moment Eater
Friday, February 17, 2006
"Overlooked Occupations in America" vol. 212
Welcome friends. It's time to play..."Overlooked Occupations in America".
Today's occupation coincidentally pertains to buses again. It's the drivers of the short-buses. That's right.
Advantages: A smaller vehicle to manuever. Less disciplinary problems from the kids. Wider aisles to move around the bus easier. You drive early in the morning, then again in the afternoon. In between time is free. Less kids to pick up/drop off, than reg. buses. Sounds noble and caring when explaining your job to women. Rarely ever noticed while inside the bus (honestly, no one peers in a short bus to seek out the normal guy). Weekends off.
Disadvantages: Probable certification of some sort. CPR. An occasional crapping from a passenger. Must have a clean driving record. A likely drug test. Early mornings. Impossible to feel cool. The unescapable fact you'd still be driving a bus around for a living.
I pondered this over the other day as I watched a short bus stop across the street of where my cage sits. A very fat man squeezed out of the front door of the bus and blew the biggest snot-rocket from his nose. That, I decided, was the first time I ever noticed the actual people driving these joke-laden forms of transportation. I applauded him and rolled around the grass for the kids entertainment. Moj love da kids. Though I don't know how many registered the fact I was a giant ape.
Tune in next time, when we discuss the shadowy voice that is the tow-truck dispatcher, on "Overlooked Occupations of America".
Mojokong - from under the rock
"Overlooked Occupations in America" vol. 212
Welcome friends. It's time to play..."Overlooked Occupations in America".
Today's occupation coincidentally pertains to buses again. It's the drivers of the short-buses. That's right.
Advantages: A smaller vehicle to manuever. Less disciplinary problems from the kids. Wider aisles to move around the bus easier. You drive early in the morning, then again in the afternoon. In between time is free. Less kids to pick up/drop off, than reg. buses. Sounds noble and caring when explaining your job to women. Rarely ever noticed while inside the bus (honestly, no one peers in a short bus to seek out the normal guy). Weekends off.
Disadvantages: Probable certification of some sort. CPR. An occasional crapping from a passenger. Must have a clean driving record. A likely drug test. Early mornings. Impossible to feel cool. The unescapable fact you'd still be driving a bus around for a living.
I pondered this over the other day as I watched a short bus stop across the street of where my cage sits. A very fat man squeezed out of the front door of the bus and blew the biggest snot-rocket from his nose. That, I decided, was the first time I ever noticed the actual people driving these joke-laden forms of transportation. I applauded him and rolled around the grass for the kids entertainment. Moj love da kids. Though I don't know how many registered the fact I was a giant ape.
Tune in next time, when we discuss the shadowy voice that is the tow-truck dispatcher, on "Overlooked Occupations of America".
Mojokong - from under the rock
Thursday, February 16, 2006
MetroFlu
Yesterday, I decided that consistantly riding the metro city bus is the equivalent of a flu shot. Think about it.
First of all the folks who ride the bus are typically second-class citizens, who on average probably carry around more germs with them on an everyday basis than car drivers. They then pack closely together and spread their germs all over the seats, railings, and air.
Then you get on the bus and slide your hand down the entire railing, sit where twelve other people have sat just today, and inhale the recycled breath of everybody else who has ridden.
There is no germ that doesn't make it 's way onto the bus. Your immune system overtime exposes and strengthens itself to diseases scientists have yet to identify. In short, you become the most prepared body for any virus nature can throw at you.
So take the bus, and when some dirty looking man boards in front of Good Sam Hospital, and begins coughing violently, and even needs to spit something into a worn out old paper towel. Go over, sit next to him and take a deep breath. Soon you'll be laughing in the face of the bird flu.
* not recommended for people with cancer, reperators, or yo mama. side effects include lower self esteem, a general increase of annoyance, and ultimately death.
MetroFlu
Yesterday, I decided that consistantly riding the metro city bus is the equivalent of a flu shot. Think about it.
First of all the folks who ride the bus are typically second-class citizens, who on average probably carry around more germs with them on an everyday basis than car drivers. They then pack closely together and spread their germs all over the seats, railings, and air.
Then you get on the bus and slide your hand down the entire railing, sit where twelve other people have sat just today, and inhale the recycled breath of everybody else who has ridden.
There is no germ that doesn't make it 's way onto the bus. Your immune system overtime exposes and strengthens itself to diseases scientists have yet to identify. In short, you become the most prepared body for any virus nature can throw at you.
So take the bus, and when some dirty looking man boards in front of Good Sam Hospital, and begins coughing violently, and even needs to spit something into a worn out old paper towel. Go over, sit next to him and take a deep breath. Soon you'll be laughing in the face of the bird flu.
* not recommended for people with cancer, reperators, or yo mama. side effects include lower self esteem, a general increase of annoyance, and ultimately death.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
bread crumbs
I mentioned that a political power was behind perpetuating the Mohammed cartoons in my entry "Lonny Toons". Now we know it's either U.S., Israel, or both.
For those who havn't, read this N.Y. Times story, http://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/14/international/middleeast/14cnd-mideast.html?_r=1&oref=slogin.
Okay, for those who still didn't read that, it says that Isaeli officials are figuring out ways to overthrow the new Hamas government in Palestine. Both US and Israel plan to "starve the Palestinian authority of money to the point where Palestinians will grow tired of Hamas leadership, and current leader Mahmoud Abbas will need to call for another election."
Disgusting. First, we demand democracy be implemented throughout the entire universe, because they tell us it's the best way of life, and that every human deserves it. Then when a country goes through democratic measures in VOTING for a new election, and it doesn't go the way the US likes, so we do whatever it takes to change that outcome. Now, when I suggest that US and Isaeli foriegn policy are the same, that's because it is.
Clearly this neo-conservative, zionist movement to force a regime change in Palestine, has orchestrated the Mohammed cartoon riots throughout the Middle East, in order to portray the Islamic populace as a group to be scared of, and make it easier to remove Hamas from leadership. Bush will connect the two situations the next time he speaks publicly, I almost guarantee you.
I hope your ready for real violent situation in that area, folks. Israel isn't welcomed to that general neighborhood, and Iran has recently called openly for the destruction of Israel. It only makes sense that Iran would aid Hamas in any kind of military confrontation with Israel. That would likely motivate Syria and Hezbollah to get involved. Then the US would have to protect Israel and stretch the military out furthur, not to mention increasing the macro Islamic hatred toward the US.
And the worst part of it is that both US and Israel would be guilty of some serious war crimes, but not even the UN would fuck with them. You can't overturn a fair democratic election because you don't like the outcome. But we refuse to comply to international war crime protocal. I bet if you asked Milosivich, he'd say the same thing. That guy's defending himself in the Hague war crime tribunal. Bush knows he will never be foced to face any type of that scenario because he and his NeoCons runs this world. He and the other select large business owners dictate the course of our history. They make the power moves just like this one.
Be ready folks. The shit is ever so close to the fan, and we'll live to see it splatter. Learn the survival skills now. Practice relying on only yourself, so you might be prepared for anything.
To the NSA: I obvioulsy have no proof as to the content of this blog entry. It is solely my opinion based on public information, which I have interpreted as such. You scare me just enough for me to clarify. Congratulations.
The Mighty Mojokong
bread crumbs
I mentioned that a political power was behind perpetuating the Mohammed cartoons in my entry "Lonny Toons". Now we know it's either U.S., Israel, or both.
For those who havn't, read this N.Y. Times story, http://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/14/international/middleeast/14cnd-mideast.html?_r=1&oref=slogin.
Okay, for those who still didn't read that, it says that Isaeli officials are figuring out ways to overthrow the new Hamas government in Palestine. Both US and Israel plan to "starve the Palestinian authority of money to the point where Palestinians will grow tired of Hamas leadership, and current leader Mahmoud Abbas will need to call for another election."
Disgusting. First, we demand democracy be implemented throughout the entire universe, because they tell us it's the best way of life, and that every human deserves it. Then when a country goes through democratic measures in VOTING for a new election, and it doesn't go the way the US likes, so we do whatever it takes to change that outcome. Now, when I suggest that US and Isaeli foriegn policy are the same, that's because it is.
Clearly this neo-conservative, zionist movement to force a regime change in Palestine, has orchestrated the Mohammed cartoon riots throughout the Middle East, in order to portray the Islamic populace as a group to be scared of, and make it easier to remove Hamas from leadership. Bush will connect the two situations the next time he speaks publicly, I almost guarantee you.
I hope your ready for real violent situation in that area, folks. Israel isn't welcomed to that general neighborhood, and Iran has recently called openly for the destruction of Israel. It only makes sense that Iran would aid Hamas in any kind of military confrontation with Israel. That would likely motivate Syria and Hezbollah to get involved. Then the US would have to protect Israel and stretch the military out furthur, not to mention increasing the macro Islamic hatred toward the US.
And the worst part of it is that both US and Israel would be guilty of some serious war crimes, but not even the UN would fuck with them. You can't overturn a fair democratic election because you don't like the outcome. But we refuse to comply to international war crime protocal. I bet if you asked Milosivich, he'd say the same thing. That guy's defending himself in the Hague war crime tribunal. Bush knows he will never be foced to face any type of that scenario because he and his NeoCons runs this world. He and the other select large business owners dictate the course of our history. They make the power moves just like this one.
Be ready folks. The shit is ever so close to the fan, and we'll live to see it splatter. Learn the survival skills now. Practice relying on only yourself, so you might be prepared for anything.
To the NSA: I obvioulsy have no proof as to the content of this blog entry. It is solely my opinion based on public information, which I have interpreted as such. You scare me just enough for me to clarify. Congratulations.
The Mighty Mojokong
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Happy VD
Ah...Valentines Day. There are so many opinions on today's theme. Let's have a look.
First is the classic scenario. Boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife: traditionally, the women are very excited about today. They know their man has to show them the utmost attention, and also has to make them feel very special. While the guys dread the money needed to buy some material gift that says, "I bought you this so you won't bitch at me about not caring." Also in the traditional sense, a large part of the man's motivation, is of course, the hope he'll be rewarded through some out-of-the-ordinary Valentines sex. Let's be realistic.
The next take is the depressed single person. This comes in two forms. First is the disguised"Valentine's Day is nothing but a consumer mechanism designed to make old white men richer," idea. Or the more blatant "Fuck today because I don't have anybody," attitude. These rainclouds are hard to put up with on such occasions.
Finally, we have the relieved single person. Many have recently left a relationship and smile at the idea of saving a few bucks. Others have accepted that they're alone and will sometimes reward themselves for their freedom from the Valentines Day pressures.
Really it is a Hallmark holiday. People get back out and start spending money again, and it helps the economy a bit after the post-Christmas lull. Everybody knows that. But it's also a celebration of love (I realize how cheesy that sounds). If it brings some folks closer together it can't be all bad. And all the people that paint it as a weird social pressure to need a Valentine are doing so to themselves. If your unhappy with your situation, get up and do something about it. I wish I could but they got me in this cage. Too bad, I could be a real Valentine's Day champion. I mean, you see the picture.
Mojokong- Pimp of the Chimps
Happy VD
Ah...Valentines Day. There are so many opinions on today's theme. Let's have a look.
First is the classic scenario. Boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife: traditionally, the women are very excited about today. They know their man has to show them the utmost attention, and also has to make them feel very special. While the guys dread the money needed to buy some material gift that says, "I bought you this so you won't bitch at me about not caring." Also in the traditional sense, a large part of the man's motivation, is of course, the hope he'll be rewarded through some out-of-the-ordinary Valentines sex. Let's be realistic.
The next take is the depressed single person. This comes in two forms. First is the disguised"Valentine's Day is nothing but a consumer mechanism designed to make old white men richer," idea. Or the more blatant "Fuck today because I don't have anybody," attitude. These rainclouds are hard to put up with on such occasions.
Finally, we have the relieved single person. Many have recently left a relationship and smile at the idea of saving a few bucks. Others have accepted that they're alone and will sometimes reward themselves for their freedom from the Valentines Day pressures.
Really it is a Hallmark holiday. People get back out and start spending money again, and it helps the economy a bit after the post-Christmas lull. Everybody knows that. But it's also a celebration of love (I realize how cheesy that sounds). If it brings some folks closer together it can't be all bad. And all the people that paint it as a weird social pressure to need a Valentine are doing so to themselves. If your unhappy with your situation, get up and do something about it. I wish I could but they got me in this cage. Too bad, I could be a real Valentine's Day champion. I mean, you see the picture.
Mojokong- Pimp of the Chimps
Monday, February 13, 2006
Loony Toons
Everybody has heard of the Mohamed cartoon by now, and of the raucous protests it's caused. But what's it really about?
It's about two major points.
A) Freedom of press.
B) Not only acceptance of Islam, but also the involuntary submission for non-believers.
I see it like this. The cartoons were clearly inflammatory (you can see them on Wikipedia), and intentionally insensitive. I don't know the prowess of this Danish newspaper that published the cartoons, but I doubt it's that large of a publication. Some kind of political power blew this story up to intentionally stir up such a mess. but what side is the question?
You could see it from the western perspective, as an Islamic extremist group fanning the flames of hatred and trying to create an excuse to facilitate more violence on Western interests.
Or it could be viewed from the angle that western media continues to paint the middle east as an area populated with violent religious hard-liners.
A newspaper should print whatever they think is fit to print. The folks they offend should encourage others to ignore such stupidity instead of rallying against it. How could a "news" outlet continue to offend, corrupt, brainwash, ect., if no one pays any attention. Instead what's happened in Denmark is that the newspaper that initially printed the offensive cartoons has received global publicity. And when the unrest settles down, that newspaper will be remembered for what happened and more subscribers will join just to see if they do it again.
Also, the Islamic world can't expect for non-belivers (kaffir) to totally respect the customs or philosophies of their religion all the time. The world should accept Islam as real and good for millions of people. But Muslims in turn should accept and allow outsiders to do whatever they do, so long as it doesn't directly interfere with their personal life. The cartoon idolized Mohamed. A big no-no in Islam. But it had no direct impact in anyone's life who simply ignored it. Unlike, say, an invasion of an Islamic country. That's direct involvement.
I want people out there to consider both sides of these news reports, and to decide on their own what is really behind it all. This weird situation has been backed by a powerful organization. Who and why is what matters.
Loony Toons
Everybody has heard of the Mohamed cartoon by now, and of the raucous protests it's caused. But what's it really about?
It's about two major points.
A) Freedom of press.
B) Not only acceptance of Islam, but also the involuntary submission for non-believers.
I see it like this. The cartoons were clearly inflammatory (you can see them on Wikipedia), and intentionally insensitive. I don't know the prowess of this Danish newspaper that published the cartoons, but I doubt it's that large of a publication. Some kind of political power blew this story up to intentionally stir up such a mess. but what side is the question?
You could see it from the western perspective, as an Islamic extremist group fanning the flames of hatred and trying to create an excuse to facilitate more violence on Western interests.
Or it could be viewed from the angle that western media continues to paint the middle east as an area populated with violent religious hard-liners.
A newspaper should print whatever they think is fit to print. The folks they offend should encourage others to ignore such stupidity instead of rallying against it. How could a "news" outlet continue to offend, corrupt, brainwash, ect., if no one pays any attention. Instead what's happened in Denmark is that the newspaper that initially printed the offensive cartoons has received global publicity. And when the unrest settles down, that newspaper will be remembered for what happened and more subscribers will join just to see if they do it again.
Also, the Islamic world can't expect for non-belivers (kaffir) to totally respect the customs or philosophies of their religion all the time. The world should accept Islam as real and good for millions of people. But Muslims in turn should accept and allow outsiders to do whatever they do, so long as it doesn't directly interfere with their personal life. The cartoon idolized Mohamed. A big no-no in Islam. But it had no direct impact in anyone's life who simply ignored it. Unlike, say, an invasion of an Islamic country. That's direct involvement.
I want people out there to consider both sides of these news reports, and to decide on their own what is really behind it all. This weird situation has been backed by a powerful organization. Who and why is what matters.
Monday, February 13, 2006
the stickers on baseball hats.
Today's rant concerns the stickers on the bills of the baseball hats these youngsters are sporting nowadays. Never mind that the hat already looks like shit with their ears tucked underneath because it's three sizes too big, or the fact the bill is flat, or even that every emblem in the NBA is splattered all over it. Gangsta cowboys with A.D.D. hats, is what they remind me of.
It's the, "See, it's not a knockoff. I paid full price 'cause I got it like that." attitude that's getting to me. Consumption status at it's worst. Reminds me of when kids use to leave the Nike tags on thier shoes. I understand it's important to be noticed and feel accepted, and that it's also important to feel proud of your image. But those hats are like thirty bucks, and rarely do you ever see an old tarnished one. The New Era symbol is visible enough cool guy. Use that three hundred bucks a year on a decent muffler instead and go ahead, buy a knockoff hat.
Mojokong the Mangy
the stickers on baseball hats.
Today's rant concerns the stickers on the bills of the baseball hats these youngsters are sporting nowadays. Never mind that the hat already looks like shit with their ears tucked underneath because it's three sizes too big, or the fact the bill is flat, or even that every emblem in the NBA is splattered all over it. Gangsta cowboys with A.D.D. hats, is what they remind me of.
It's the, "See, it's not a knockoff. I paid full price 'cause I got it like that." attitude that's getting to me. Consumption status at it's worst. Reminds me of when kids use to leave the Nike tags on thier shoes. I understand it's important to be noticed and feel accepted, and that it's also important to feel proud of your image. But those hats are like thirty bucks, and rarely do you ever see an old tarnished one. The New Era symbol is visible enough cool guy. Use that three hundred bucks a year on a decent muffler instead and go ahead, buy a knockoff hat.
Mojokong the Mangy
Sunday, February 12, 2006
ponderables
How does everybody feel about a war in Iran? How about a cut off of Venezuelan oil supply? Can you say $7 a gallon? What about the destruction of Israel? Are you okay with a recession? Do you speak Mandarin? You think your kids will? Know any Muslims? What do you think of them? Paying a lot for that college tuition? You really think youll ever pay it off? Is global warming real? How much time left are we talking about? What are you gonna do with all that stuff you bought? Want the bird flu? Are you vaccinated? Whats up with your neighbors? Do you even know them?
ponderables
How does everybody feel about a war in Iran? How about a cut off of Venezuelan oil supply? Can you say $7 a gallon? What about the destruction of Israel? Are you okay with a recession? Do you speak Mandarin? You think your kids will? Know any Muslims? What do you think of them? Paying a lot for that college tuition? You really think youll ever pay it off? Is global warming real? How much time left are we talking about? What are you gonna do with all that stuff you bought? Want the bird flu? Are you vaccinated? Whats up with your neighbors? Do you even know them?
Monday, August 03, 2009
Deveroes Summer League: Championship Game
The gym was packed on Saturday at Woodward High School for the Championship Game of the Deveroes Summer League. The scrappy team of S.I. Pool Care, consisting of mostly Cincinnati State players mixed in with a couple of former Bearcats and one Ivy-League big guy, faced SLATS and their squad of current UC players with a sprinkling of random bench players
S.I. Pool Care had surprised many onlookers by even making the final game. Veteran point guard, Jamual "Grimey" Warren led the young team of high-fliers through the tournament like a rancher herding athletic cattle back to the homestead.
SLATS had relied on the star power of Yancy “Oak Tree” Gates, Dion Dixon and Sean Kilpatrick to carry them into the championship. But for the big enchilada, they debuted another big gun who had recently been added to their roster: UC future-star Lance Stephenson. With Stephenson in the fold, I decided that S.I. Pool Care would be outclassed by the rich crop of Division I talent on SLATS and my colleague, Mr. Owens, was eager to put money against such a claim. We shook on it and hoped for the best.
Live action.
As the players gathered around mid-court for the tip-off, all eyes rested on the hulking physique of Lance Stephenson. At 6'5'', and around 220 lbs, Stephenson has a squarish build, complete with a broad upper-body, thick legs and a boxy head. With the swagger of a caged tiger, Lance paces around the floor with a cold, determined face, appearing relaxed but deadly.
Once play began, he moved around the court in bursts and looked to out-muscle anyone in sight. Early on he showed a combination of aggressive drives to the basket along with comfortable 3-point shooting range. When the situation called for it, Lance posted up smaller defenders and showed some quality back-to-the-basket moves. Even the most casual basketball fan could immediately detect a serious talent deep within Lance Stephenson.
Even with the offensive firepower of Stephenson and his SLATS mates, S.I. Pool Care came out unafraid. Their game plan was to score inside any way they had to. Knowing that SLATS big man, Yancy Gates, would not give his maximum effort in a summer league, championship or not, the veteran front-court of S.I. Pool care, complete with legendary Bearcat Herb Jones, strong man Jon Williamson and Colombia University center Jason Miller, both attacked the inside and drew Yancy out on mid-range jumpers. With a much deeper bench than SLATS, S.I. Pool Care subbed in the young leapers of Cincinnati State for the heavier veterans once they tired, leaving Yancy with a handful of fresh players to match up against throughout the game. As a result, S.I. Pool Care attacked the offensive glass, out-rebounding SLATS in the first half, and limited Gates offensively to six first-half points.
Going into halftime, SLATS looked unconcerned even though they were down 13 and hadn't once looked like the better team.
After an eye-popping slam dunk performance by Darnell Wilkes during halftime, the teams took the floor with little to no adjustment to their game plans. Sean Kilpatrick attempted to assert himself more in the game and came out shooting better in the second half. Stephenson drew more defensive attention after halftime, forcing Yancy to shoot the ball more. Gates responded with more points but converted most of those shooting long jumpers.
S.I. Pool Care continued to take the ball to the rack on every possession, getting fouled or scoring on second-chance points nearly every time. The added defensive pressure on Stevenson, annoyed the young superstar and forced him into a poor shooting half, five second-half fouls and a technical foul that proved to be the end for SLATS. Lance finished with 27 points, but strangely none of them seemed to have mattered much.
S.I. abandoned the 3-point shot, only hoisting three after halftime, and Grimey Warren drove to the basket with ease time and again in the game's final 10 minutes. Warren controlled the pace of the game and his team's lead, and showed to be a savvy game manager down the stretch. S.I. Was 12-14 from the free-throw line in the last half; a stat every coach stresses when playing with the lead.
SLATS resorted to jacking up 3-pointers and yelling at the referees as they watched their chances of a championship dwindle.
When the final horn sounded, S.I. Pool Care had outscored SLATS in the paint 62-34, had nine more second-chance points and 35 more bench points---SLATS finished without any. Grimey walked away from the gym with 18 points, 11 rebounds, eight assists, my vote for tournament MVP and a championship, all in a days work.
I was out $5. I'll get it back next year. Hope to see you all there too.
Mojokong---celebrating a slice of pride in our fair city of Cincinnati.
Newspaper Box Score
S.I. POOL CARE vs SLATS
08/01/09 2:30 p.m. at Woodward High School
At Woodward High School
S.I. POOL CARE 101, SLATS 84
S.I. POOL CARE
WHITE, Heath 9-16 6-9 24; WILLIAMSON, John 8-17 4-4 20; GOODSEN, Darren 7-13
4-5 18; WARREN, Jamual 8-13 1-1 18; THOMPSON, Charles 2-3 5-5 9; MENDOZA,
Maurice 1-1 2-2 4; MILLER, Jason 1-4 0-0 2; LEASHORE, Jay 1-1 0-1 2; JONES,
Herb 1-3 0-0 2; MILLEN, James 1-4 0-0 2; EDWARDS, Rob 0-0 0-0 0. Totals
39-75 22-27 101.
SLATS
STEPHENSON, Lance 8-20 8-11 26; KILPATRICK, Sean 6-16 5-6 18; DIXON, Dion
7-13 0-0 18; GATES, Yancy 6-11 4-7 17; McBRIDE, Anthony 2-7 1-2 5; STEFANOU,
Steve 0-1 0-0 0; ORR, Justin 0-2 0-0 0; ALUISE, Mike 0-1 0-0 0. Totals 29-71
18-26 84.
S.I. POOL CARE................ 53 48 - 101
SLATS......................... 40 44 - 84
3-point goals--S.I. POOL CARE 1-8 (WARREN, Jamual 1-1; WILLIAMSON, John 0-3;
GOODSEN, Darren 0-1; THOMPSON, Charles 0-1; MILLER, Jason 0-1; JONES, Herb
0-1), SLATS 8-25 (DIXON, Dion 4-8; STEPHENSON, Lance 2-5; GATES, Yancy 1-3;
KILPATRICK, Sean 1-5; ORR, Justin 0-1; ALUISE, Mike 0-1; McBRIDE, Anthony
0-2). Fouled out--S.I. POOL CARE-None, SLATS-None. Rebounds--S.I. POOL CARE
49 (WARREN, Jamual 11), SLATS 37 (GATES, Yancy 9). Assists--S.I. POOL CARE
15 (WARREN, Jamual 7), SLATS 6 (KILPATRICK, Sean 2; DIXON, Dion 2). Total
fouls--S.I. POOL CARE 20, SLATS 19. Technical fouls--S.I. POOL CARE-None,
SLATS-TEAM.
Championship Game of the Deveroes Summer League
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Deveroes Summer League: Playoffs--Semi-Final
SLATS 78, SuperiorCars.com 77
Incoming UC scoring sensation and soon-to-be media circus, Lance Stevenson was in the building at Woodward High School on Saturday, but remained in street clothes and on the bench. Nonetheless, fans were treated by a scoring outpour from another UC recruit, Sean Kilpatrick,who dropped 40 points in a one-point game against Superior in the semifinal round of the Deveroes Summer League Playoffs.
Kilpatrick caught fire early, racking up 28 first-half points, and kept SLATS in the game despite a cold-shooting first half by point guard Dion Dixon and a generally lethargic first-half effort from the Oak Tree, Yancy Gates.
Superior started five Division I players---Dante Jackson (Xavier), Anthony “Biggie” McLean (UC), Vince “Captain” Cook (Miami, OH), Jason Love (Xavier) and Deonta Vaughn (UC)---and looked like the better team for much of the game. But once Dixon settled down, and Gates woke up, SLATS gained the momentum late and edged out a great win.
The last two minutes was an intense, back-and-forth affair that saw Dante Jackson and his magical mustache drive hard for a basket plus the foul that put his team up five with 1:47 left.
With their backs against the wall, SLATS turned to outside shooting but from an unlikely source in center Yancy Gates who knocked down three second-half 3-pointers, including one in crunch-time to put his team up by one.
Superior reserve guard Armon Basset, hit a huge jumper to regain the lead by two points with under a minute to play, but then turned the ball over after a defensive stop on the next possession; a play that proved to seal their fate.
Kilpatrick then took the ball aggressively to the rim for the score and the foul and completed the three-point play, giving SLATS the lead.
Deonta Vaughn got off a good-looking three-point attempt with under five seconds left, but the shot rattled off and bounced out of bounds.
Observations:
Sean Kilpatrick flows with the game and puts up bunches of points naturally instead of dictating the pace and the ball like so many other players in this league. He moves very well without the ball and has a smooth, quick release that doesn't need much space to be effective. He plays solid face-up defense and rebounds well for a guard. Killa averaged 22.1 points for the season and was 20-51 from 3-point land.
Yancy Gates has shot from the outside almost exclusively in the last three games and has actually shown a bit of stroke from 18 feet and farther. It's unlikely Yancy will be encouraged to demonstrate this kind of shot selection during the college season, so he might as well show off his range in the DSL.
Dante Jackson plays some mean defense. Jackson disrupted Dixon in every facet of his game during the first half, and when he switched to Kilpatrick in the second, Killa appeared less deadly. Dante showed more intensity and seriousness than any other player that I've seen in this tournament. His shooting looks sharp and he clearly has the respect of his peers. Even Deonta Vaughn took a back seat to Jackson within the offense. I would look for Jackson and his Chris-Paul-stache to raise his game this upcoming season for X.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Deveroes Summer League: Playoffs--First Round
SLATS 89, Flessa 80
After watching the first round of the playoffs in the Deveroes Summer League, one thing is certain: winning matters to these guys.
Most of these players have an entire schedule of college basketball awaiting them in the fall. They will practice, play games and watch tape of basketball almost nonstop for the next six months or longer. Most people would be called obsessed if they did the same activity as much as these men play basketball. Yet here they are at Woodward High School on their free-time, balling on each other.
Then there are the local legends; the guys who once played somewhere most people have heard of and now dominate the YMCA league of their choosing. For some of these men, the DSL is their biggest stage, and it becomes their chance to finally shut these young punks up who think they’re better than everybody else.
The point is that when the game-clock ticks down, the intensity turns up. During that time, the lore and reputation of a player can wax and wane. Even though there is no money involved, the extra effort is given for the respect of ones peers—which has an interesting way of motivating people on its own.
On the car ride over, I expressed to a friend how I thought Dion Dixon was very average. Dion seemed to make hasty decisions, not do any one thing particularly well and complain a lot. On the car ride home, my opinion of him had been completely turnaround and I began wondering about him in the NBA. I’m easily impressed.
The initial intrigue of the match-up was the battle of the heavyweight centers. SLATS had the Oak Tree, Yancy Gates and his 18-foot shooting touch, while Flessa had the Human Snow-Cap, Kenny Frease and his crafty glass work. The two giants didn’t disappoint, each providing solid contributions to their team. But at the end of the night, it was Dion Dixon who made the difference.
With seven minutes left and his team down by two, Dixon decided he would take the ball to the rim every time until someone stopped him No one could stop him.
Team Flessa tried putting the tiny, but scrappy, Steve Steward on him and Dion out-muscled him. Flessa went with the scowling and barrel-chested, Paul “Mad Man” McMillan to defend him, and Dion zoomed past him. They tried the long, slender, cartoon-cat-like Darnell Wilkes who was out-muscled and zoomed past.
In that seven minutes, Dixon scored 16 points, including eight on free-throws to help his team win by nine. He showed a combination of strength, athleticism and sheer determination—particularly on defense— that proved I had severely underestimated him. He finished the game with 29 points and was 12-16 from the line. The term is thrown around a lot in the world of sports, but on this night, Dion was truly unstoppable.
SLATS as a team played good defense forcing Flessa into shooting 8-26 from 3-point territory. Explosive scorers Eddie Gray and Paul McMillan each shot poorly. McMillan missed multiple close range shots inside down the stretch and although he finished with 24 points, he seemed too irritated to get into rhythm. Gray bounced around and dazzled with his quickness and his ball-handling skills, but he hoisted three-pointers up from all over the court unable to find a spot he liked. He finished 3-12 from outside.
Aside from feeding Frease in the post, Flessa never worked a team offense into the game plan and relied on one-on-one match-ups for scoring. With Flessa’s veteran gunslingers, that philosophy normally suits them just fine, but sometimes a team needs more than that to beat a young, talented team like SLATS.
SLATS plays SuperiorCars.com in the semi-finals on Saturday,12:30pm, at Woodward High School.
Box Score:
SLATS vs JOHN H. FLESSA LAW OFFICE (07/22/09 at Woodward High School)
Official Basketball Box Score
SLATS vs JOHN H. FLESSA LAW OFFICE
07/22/09 7:30 p.m. at Woodward High School
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VISITORS: SLATS
TOT-FG 3-PT REBOUNDS
## Player Name FG-FGA FG-FGA FT-FTA OF DE TOT PF TP A TO BLK S MIN
04 STEFANOU, Steve..... f 2-4 1-1 0-0 1 3 4 1 5 3 2 0 0 20
24 GATES, Yancy........ f 10-21 1-2 1-2 6 7 13 2 22 3 0 0 0 32
01 McBRIDE, Anthony.... g 6-12 0-2 2-2 1 4 5 2 14 0 0 0 1 32
03 DIXON, Dion......... g 8-17 1-6 12-16 2 4 6 3 29 4 4 2 1 32
23 KILPATRICK, Sean.... g 8-13 1-5 2-2 3 3 6 0 19 3 3 0 1 32
14 ALUISE, Mike........ 0-2 0-1 0-0 0 1 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 12
TEAM................ 1 3 4 1
Totals.............. 34-69 4-17 17-22 14 25 39 8 89 14 10 2 3 160
TOTAL FG% 1st Half: 16-41 39.0% 2nd Half: 18-28 64.3% Game: 49.3% DEADB
3-Pt. FG% 1st Half: 2-11 18.2% 2nd Half: 2-6 33.3% Game: 23.5% REBS
F Throw % 1st Half: 3-5 60.0% 2nd Half: 14-17 82.4% Game: 77.3% 1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HOME TEAM: JOHN H. FLESSA LAW OFFICE
TOT-FG 3-PT REBOUNDS
## Player Name FG-FGA FG-FGA FT-FTA OF DE TOT PF TP A TO BLK S MIN
22 FREASE, Kenny....... f 8-11 0-1 2-2 1 10 11 0 18 2 4 2 0 27
23 WILKES, Darnell..... f 1-2 0-0 0-0 1 3 4 4 2 2 0 1 0 21
24 McMILLAN, Paul...... f 9-19 2-4 4-5 5 4 9 2 24 0 4 0 0 26
05 STEWARD, Steve...... g 3-7 0-0 2-2 1 1 2 3 8 1 0 0 2 24
11 BYRD, DeAndre....... g 5-16 3-9 0-0 3 1 4 2 13 3 4 0 0 30
01 GRAY, Eddie......... 5-15 3-12 0-0 2 2 4 2 13 4 0 0 1 24
04 JACKSON, Joe........ 1-3 0-0 0-0 2 2 4 1 2 1 1 0 0 8
TEAM................ 2 2 4
Totals.............. 32-73 8-26 8-9 17 25 42 14 80 13 13 3 3 160
TOTAL FG% 1st Half: 17-36 47.2% 2nd Half: 15-37 40.5% Game: 43.8% DEADB
3-Pt. FG% 1st Half: 5-14 35.7% 2nd Half: 3-12 25.0% Game: 30.8% REBS
F Throw % 1st Half: 5-6 83.3% 2nd Half: 3-3 100 % Game: 88.9% 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Officials:
Technical fouls: SLATS-None. JOHN H. FLESSA LAW OFFICE-None.
Attendance:
Score by Periods 1st 2nd Total
SLATS......................... 37 52 - 89
JOHN H. FLESSA LAW OFFICE..... 44 36 - 80
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Deveroes Summer League: Regular Season
Monday, 7/20/2009
It seems shameful to admit that I had never been to the Deveroes Summer Basketball League until yesterday, but it’s true.
All I’d been missing every summer at Woodward High School, is a three-dollar sneak-peek at Cincinnati’s best hoopsters playing on different teams with different coaches, learning to adjust to new roles and new referees, and, perhaps more importantly, trying not to get dunked on.
The level of competition is slightly better than I suspected. The big names playing at the University of Cincinnati and Xavier University obviously showcase the event, but it’s the obscure players that climb out of the woodwork and light up the scoreboard that make the league legitimate.
I was also surprised at the extent of the season; ten teams play a nine-game season, and the top eight teams play in a single-loss tournament. College coaches are not allowed to attend the games, so players like Yancy Gates can fire up three-pointers all he wants without worrying about being benched and screamed at for a week. Yancy spent the day hovering around the outside, testing his range without success. No one said a word about it.
Live action.
Former Xavier legend, Jamal Walker is the MC for the event, and although he at times nearly damages his microphone from his vocal enthusiasm on breakaway dunks and big three-pointers, the man is pure comedy who could eventually make Dick Cheney crack a smile. He was fantastic with his nicknames (Steven Toyloy was “Muscles”, Jamal Warren was “Grimey”, Sean Kilpatrick was “Killa”) and impressed me with his anecdotal tidbits about each player. He called the game well, and would at times do something else entirely, leaving the spectator to silently take in the moving poetry of the game on their own. However, when he did eventually return to his post as public announcer, he began with, “Live action” every time, and resumed his play-by-play hilarity. The basketball makes the event, but laughing at Jamal all day is worth the three bucks to get in.
Teams are named after their sponsor which results in intriguing match-ups like Superior Cars.com versus S.I. Pool Care. Each team wears a different color of the same t-shirt which features Wolverine brandishing his metallic claws and has a dialogue bubble that reads, “Come get some Bud!”. It seems the designer of the shirt overlooked the facts that Wolverine typically refers to his villains as “Bub”, and that a comma is necessary to indicate that he is calling someone Bud. Luckily, the confusion did not cause hordes of shaggy people to turn up hoping to procure available Wolverine bud.
Live action.
New Xavier sensation, Jordan Crawford, showed up for the season finale and dropped an effortless 31 points in 28 minutes, including a ferocious dunk on another XU newcomer, Jeff Robinson. Crawford’s style is mellow and controlled, but freakishly athletic and all-in-all deadly; players like Glen Robinson and James Harden spring to mind as comparisons. He doesn’t appear to have a smooth, natural shooting stroke, but at the same time, he went 3-for-6 from three, highlighted by a deep fade-away as the shot-clock ran out.
Crawford’s a long-strider, getting into the lane easily and he likes to cup the ball as he swoops in for finger-rolls and runners. He showed enough handles and court awareness to use as a point guard if needed; similar to the role that Harden played at Arizona State last year. And yet, after all of that praise, Crawford’s most impressive facet is his leaping ability. It’s scary.
His team, OHC, had the best record of the regular season (8-1) and features other Xavier players, like incoming freshman guard Mark Lyons, and the freshly graduated yet still visibly sleepy, C.J. Anderson. Lyons appeared super-quick, having no problem getting to the paint and eventually the line, but still looked very young, demonstrating freshman symptoms like poor shot selection, not finishing around the rim, and dribbling too much. With time and coaching, Lyons should become a legitimate starting point guard someday, but from the little I’ve seen, I wouldn’t trust him with the keys just yet.
For size, the squad has former Dayton Flyer forward Norm Plummer, banging around his 6'7'’, wide-bodied frame. Plummer posted season totals of 16 points and nine rebounds a game, and kept smiling the whole time—who couldn’t root for a guy like that?
At one point during the game, OHC head coach Ozie Davis III, was moved enough to cry out chants of MVP. Jamal Walker stopped his play-by-play and asked Ozie who he was referring to. Ozie emphatically announced “Norm Plummer”, and everyone laughed. That’s just the kind of place it was.
Live action.
SLATS is the other team that gets most of the attention. Its roster is composed of all UC players and is led by the bruiser, Yancy Gates. Gates is a wide and beefy 6'9"; a person that seems rooted to where he stands. It must be like boxing out an Oak tree for opponents. He certainly has an NBA body, but has only shown flashes of an NBA game thus far in his career.
In the match-up against SuperiorCars.com, Gates made defender Biggie McLean’s day easier by lurking outside and hoisting threes and long twos instead of working his college teammate in the post. Gates could dominate a league like this if he wanted to, but that may be why it doesn’t happen.
One player on SLATS who seems comfortable in his role, is UC freshman guard Sean Kilpatrick. Killa put up over 20 points a game on the season and was third in field goals. He showed a nice shooting stroke and seemed to be one of the only SLATS players to let the game come to him. He plays with a quiet sneakiness and looks dangerous from the outside. I see enough swagger in his game to picture him the league at some point.
One of the most impressive players of the day was Miami sophomore Vince “Captain” Cook, who helped SuperiorCars.com beat SLATS on that day. Cook was extremely active defensively and had stretches where he seemed unguardable. A bonus of Captain Cook is his very genuine pirate beard, which, in my book, makes him an immediate fan favorite.
The other game of the day featured Eddie Gray; a man I know nothing about, but in around an hour, showed me that there’s something legendary about him. Imagine a mini Chauncy Billups; an older, veteran player, who gets fired up and drops backbreaking threes each time down the floor. Eddie Gray had 27 points, including five three-pointers in 25 minutes and he taught the youngsters playing for the Cincinnati State team (S.I. Pool Care) how to properly respect their elders.
Unlike the high-profile, Division I characters around the gym, the older guys like Eddie Gray live for these moments and take it all very seriously. It’s players like these that usually play a key role in determining who wins the whole thing. His team, John H. Flessa Law Office, is made up of a handful of veterans, including perennial leading scorer, Paul McMillan, and a young guy; a high-flying UC swingman named Darnell Wilkes. It wouldn’t be a long shot to pick Flessa as a championship team. Their first test will be against Yancy Gates and SLATS on Wednesday.
Live action.
Monday, 7/20/2009
It seems shameful to admit that I had never been to the Deveroes Summer Basketball League until yesterday, but it’s true.
All I’d been missing every summer at Woodward High School, is a three-dollar sneak-peek at Cincinnati’s best hoopsters playing on different teams with different coaches, learning to adjust to new roles and new referees, and, perhaps more importantly, trying not to get dunked on.
The level of competition is slightly better than I suspected. The big names playing at the University of Cincinnati and Xavier University obviously showcase the event, but it’s the obscure players that climb out of the woodwork and light up the scoreboard that make the league legitimate.
I was also surprised at the extent of the season; ten teams play a nine-game season, and the top eight teams play in a single-loss tournament. College coaches are not allowed to attend the games, so players like Yancy Gates can fire up three-pointers all he wants without worrying about being benched and screamed at for a week. Yancy spent the day hovering around the outside, testing his range without success. No one said a word about it.
Live action.
Former Xavier legend, Jamal Walker is the MC for the event, and although he at times nearly damages his microphone from his vocal enthusiasm on breakaway dunks and big three-pointers, the man is pure comedy who could eventually make Dick Cheney crack a smile. He was fantastic with his nicknames (Steven Toyloy was “Muscles”, Jamal Warren was “Grimey”, Sean Kilpatrick was “Killa”) and impressed me with his anecdotal tidbits about each player. He called the game well, and would at times do something else entirely, leaving the spectator to silently take in the moving poetry of the game on their own. However, when he did eventually return to his post as public announcer, he began with, “Live action” every time, and resumed his play-by-play hilarity. The basketball makes the event, but laughing at Jamal all day is worth the three bucks to get in.
Teams are named after their sponsor which results in intriguing match-ups like Superior Cars.com versus S.I. Pool Care. Each team wears a different color of the same t-shirt which features Wolverine brandishing his metallic claws and has a dialogue bubble that reads, “Come get some Bud!”. It seems the designer of the shirt overlooked the facts that Wolverine typically refers to his villains as “Bub”, and that a comma is necessary to indicate that he is calling someone Bud. Luckily, the confusion did not cause hordes of shaggy people to turn up hoping to procure available Wolverine bud.
Live action.
New Xavier sensation, Jordan Crawford, showed up for the season finale and dropped an effortless 31 points in 28 minutes, including a ferocious dunk on another XU newcomer, Jeff Robinson. Crawford’s style is mellow and controlled, but freakishly athletic and all-in-all deadly; players like Glen Robinson and James Harden spring to mind as comparisons. He doesn’t appear to have a smooth, natural shooting stroke, but at the same time, he went 3-for-6 from three, highlighted by a deep fade-away as the shot-clock ran out.
Crawford’s a long-strider, getting into the lane easily and he likes to cup the ball as he swoops in for finger-rolls and runners. He showed enough handles and court awareness to use as a point guard if needed; similar to the role that Harden played at Arizona State last year. And yet, after all of that praise, Crawford’s most impressive facet is his leaping ability. It’s scary.
His team, OHC, had the best record of the regular season (8-1) and features other Xavier players, like incoming freshman guard Mark Lyons, and the freshly graduated yet still visibly sleepy, C.J. Anderson. Lyons appeared super-quick, having no problem getting to the paint and eventually the line, but still looked very young, demonstrating freshman symptoms like poor shot selection, not finishing around the rim, and dribbling too much. With time and coaching, Lyons should become a legitimate starting point guard someday, but from the little I’ve seen, I wouldn’t trust him with the keys just yet.
For size, the squad has former Dayton Flyer forward Norm Plummer, banging around his 6'7'’, wide-bodied frame. Plummer posted season totals of 16 points and nine rebounds a game, and kept smiling the whole time—who couldn’t root for a guy like that?
At one point during the game, OHC head coach Ozie Davis III, was moved enough to cry out chants of MVP. Jamal Walker stopped his play-by-play and asked Ozie who he was referring to. Ozie emphatically announced “Norm Plummer”, and everyone laughed. That’s just the kind of place it was.
Live action.
SLATS is the other team that gets most of the attention. Its roster is composed of all UC players and is led by the bruiser, Yancy Gates. Gates is a wide and beefy 6'9"; a person that seems rooted to where he stands. It must be like boxing out an Oak tree for opponents. He certainly has an NBA body, but has only shown flashes of an NBA game thus far in his career.
In the match-up against SuperiorCars.com, Gates made defender Biggie McLean’s day easier by lurking outside and hoisting threes and long twos instead of working his college teammate in the post. Gates could dominate a league like this if he wanted to, but that may be why it doesn’t happen.
One player on SLATS who seems comfortable in his role, is UC freshman guard Sean Kilpatrick. Killa put up over 20 points a game on the season and was third in field goals. He showed a nice shooting stroke and seemed to be one of the only SLATS players to let the game come to him. He plays with a quiet sneakiness and looks dangerous from the outside. I see enough swagger in his game to picture him the league at some point.
One of the most impressive players of the day was Miami sophomore Vince “Captain” Cook, who helped SuperiorCars.com beat SLATS on that day. Cook was extremely active defensively and had stretches where he seemed unguardable. A bonus of Captain Cook is his very genuine pirate beard, which, in my book, makes him an immediate fan favorite.
The other game of the day featured Eddie Gray; a man I know nothing about, but in around an hour, showed me that there’s something legendary about him. Imagine a mini Chauncy Billups; an older, veteran player, who gets fired up and drops backbreaking threes each time down the floor. Eddie Gray had 27 points, including five three-pointers in 25 minutes and he taught the youngsters playing for the Cincinnati State team (S.I. Pool Care) how to properly respect their elders.
Unlike the high-profile, Division I characters around the gym, the older guys like Eddie Gray live for these moments and take it all very seriously. It’s players like these that usually play a key role in determining who wins the whole thing. His team, John H. Flessa Law Office, is made up of a handful of veterans, including perennial leading scorer, Paul McMillan, and a young guy; a high-flying UC swingman named Darnell Wilkes. It wouldn’t be a long shot to pick Flessa as a championship team. Their first test will be against Yancy Gates and SLATS on Wednesday.
Live action.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
A Letter To Steeler Nation:
Steeler Nation,
First off, congratulations on winning your sixth Super Bowl Championship. I trust it still rests comfortably atop your collective mind. Secondly, I must say, I admire your obsession with your team. A Steeler fan seems always willing to display his or her loyalty anywhere in the world, at times creating awkward, even socially-damaging effects, yet one carries on undeterred. And, thirdly, it is impossible to call you a group made up largely of bandwagoneers because you’re rarely absent from the playoffs and it’s hard to lose fan support when the team always wins. So there you have it.
Now, with all pleasantries aside, it’s time to speak of your team’s identity. What the universe should agree upon is that the Steelers are made up of defense and a running game—any dumbbell knows that. However, let’s not pretend that a central characteristic to your team’s success is not deception. Within the past six years, the Steelers have been the experts at the ol’ trickeration, often times at the Bengals’ expense–most notably in the dreaded playoff game of 2005; a play that sealed the fate of the Bengals’ season and still causes the venom to rise in the mouths of bitter Who-Deyers today.
And your defense is run by a man who predicates his whole philosophy on the slight-of-hand. One could produce an entire college thesis on the deceptive strategies of Dick LeBeau’s defenses. He’s always one step ahead of the league because he continues to trick everyone.
My beef, Steeler Nation, is that you assume that what you see unfold every year is due to sheer strength and determination, when there is something more cunning there, more conniving. I’m not at all saying that you’re dirty, I’m saying you’re sneaky. You want a sheer muscle team who socks you in your mouth? Try Baltimore. Pittsburgh will outsmart the Ravens, yes, but that doesn’t mean you’re tougher.
A feeble Bengals’ fan like myself has no defense to your many, many championships and your apparent sheer awesomeness. You need not even look in our direction when we simpletons from Southern Ohio & Northern Kentucky exercise our underdeveloped vocal chords about how maybe you’re the evil genius who wins in the end rather than the muscle-bounded hero everyone else was rooting for. That’s why we don’t like you, Steeler Nation; you’re Iago, you’re Gargamel, you’re Skeletor. I’d rather not face it either; I don’t blame you, but you suck. You must at least acknowledge, someday, and hopefully soon, that you suck.
Best of luck this season. Go jump off a cliff, just as soon as you can. I truly despise you. Hugs & Kisses.
Sincerely,
B. Clifton Burke
Steeler Nation,
First off, congratulations on winning your sixth Super Bowl Championship. I trust it still rests comfortably atop your collective mind. Secondly, I must say, I admire your obsession with your team. A Steeler fan seems always willing to display his or her loyalty anywhere in the world, at times creating awkward, even socially-damaging effects, yet one carries on undeterred. And, thirdly, it is impossible to call you a group made up largely of bandwagoneers because you’re rarely absent from the playoffs and it’s hard to lose fan support when the team always wins. So there you have it.
Now, with all pleasantries aside, it’s time to speak of your team’s identity. What the universe should agree upon is that the Steelers are made up of defense and a running game—any dumbbell knows that. However, let’s not pretend that a central characteristic to your team’s success is not deception. Within the past six years, the Steelers have been the experts at the ol’ trickeration, often times at the Bengals’ expense–most notably in the dreaded playoff game of 2005; a play that sealed the fate of the Bengals’ season and still causes the venom to rise in the mouths of bitter Who-Deyers today.
And your defense is run by a man who predicates his whole philosophy on the slight-of-hand. One could produce an entire college thesis on the deceptive strategies of Dick LeBeau’s defenses. He’s always one step ahead of the league because he continues to trick everyone.
My beef, Steeler Nation, is that you assume that what you see unfold every year is due to sheer strength and determination, when there is something more cunning there, more conniving. I’m not at all saying that you’re dirty, I’m saying you’re sneaky. You want a sheer muscle team who socks you in your mouth? Try Baltimore. Pittsburgh will outsmart the Ravens, yes, but that doesn’t mean you’re tougher.
A feeble Bengals’ fan like myself has no defense to your many, many championships and your apparent sheer awesomeness. You need not even look in our direction when we simpletons from Southern Ohio & Northern Kentucky exercise our underdeveloped vocal chords about how maybe you’re the evil genius who wins in the end rather than the muscle-bounded hero everyone else was rooting for. That’s why we don’t like you, Steeler Nation; you’re Iago, you’re Gargamel, you’re Skeletor. I’d rather not face it either; I don’t blame you, but you suck. You must at least acknowledge, someday, and hopefully soon, that you suck.
Best of luck this season. Go jump off a cliff, just as soon as you can. I truly despise you. Hugs & Kisses.
Sincerely,
B. Clifton Burke
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