I don’t have one nice thing. My computer is $400 tops.. I’m twenty-seven and have owned a car for about three months in my life. My furniture is one small step up from a homeless shelter’s. A really crappy recliner, a futon that needs to lean on a wall to function, a coffee table that looks like wood but weighs like 8 ounces, a decent rocking chair, and a broken speaker that works as a lamp table. Oh yeah, some wobbly metal shelves and a dented mini fridge. I have a PS 2 with two broken controllers that we still try to play with, and two football games. A 19 inch TV that looks bruised on the sides from discoloration. I don’t have a printer, scanner, digital camera, or an ipod for my computer. I have a bed that my ex girlfriend and perhaps others sleep on every night, at her apartment which I’m not even sure where that is. I have a dog, who’s an old mutt with early signs of arthritis. I have a bunch of books most of which are second hand and some outdated useless textbooks. My backpack’s zipper is broken and I can’t quite zip it closed all the way I have a suit that’s too big, five collard shirts; three are plaid, I don’t own any dress shoes or a tie. Or dress socks. I have a leather jacket that I wore once before Andy’s dog ripped the shit out of the front of it. I have a really dilapidated, dusty ass guitar that I’ve played a combined three minutes. I have a few broken space heaters that are major fire hazards. I live in a cold basement at my dad’s house. I make $400 a month. I have about thirty five bucks in change...that’s nice.
This sounds like the profile of Grounds Keeper Willie.